'The Breakfast Club': Mental Health and Generational Identities Explored

Step into the world of generational identity with Erin and Tanya as they delve into the iconic film "The Breakfast Club." 

In this thought-provoking podcast episode, the Wicked Psychotherapists explore the timeless themes of adolescence, family dynamics, and societal pressures depicted in this 80s classic. 

From discussing the characters' struggles with identity and belonging to unraveling the impact of generational differences on mental health, Erin and Tanya offer insightful commentary peppered with humor and relatable anecdotes. 

Join them on a journey through nostalgia and introspection as they unpack the layers of cultural influence and personal growth embedded within this beloved coming-of-age tale. 

Whether you're a Gen Xer, a Millennial, or somewhere in between, this episode promises to resonate with listeners of all ages. 

Tune in and discover why "The Breakfast Club" continues to captivate audiences and spark meaningful conversations about the human experience across generations.

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Transcript

0:08

You are listening to Wicked Psychotherapists, a podcast where two psychotherapists show you that taking care of and learning about mental health doesn't have to be wicked hard.

Tanya: 0:31

Hi, everyone. This is Tanya.

Erin: 0:32

Hi, this is Erin, and welcome to Wicked Psychotherapist.

Tanya: 0:36

Yes, welcome. So, uh, today we are going to be talking about an 80s cult favorite something that all you Gen Xers and probably some late millennials will love, uh, The Breakfast Club. So we, uh, thought this would be really cool to talk about in terms of Mental health and, all the different roles that are, in this movie, as well as just some aspects of high schoolism. I think it would be good just going back to the 80s is always fun for us, so. Yeah,

Erin: 1:05

I don't know why in my head at first I was thinking it was, early 90s, late 80s, but I think it was like 1985.

Tanya: 1:12

Yeah, it was, I think it was mid, yeah, 1985, 1986 or something. Yeah. But yeah, it's a classic. I mean it's one that when people are from that era, they usually know it, you either know it or you don't kind of thing. So I know that this was a big movie in my house growing up. One of my sisters was like, is still obsessed with it. Uh, and. Just the, all the different characters that are in it, all the, people that are, like, uh, you know, famous in it, that are, you know, actors and everything, uh, it's really interesting to kind of take a look at it in terms of mental health, because it certainly is something I think we can all relate to, or we can at least relate to one character, if not multiple ones in there. But I did want to ask, you know, first how do you feel about the movie? What's, your take on it? Like when did you first watch it? Any memories of watching it?

Erin: 1:59

I think I probably first saw it I don't, think I saw it in the movie theater because I would have been, I would have been in sixth grade, no, not even sixth grade,

Tanya: 2:09

I definitely remember, I, I did, I think I was only about three when this movie came out. So I definitely, I know I saw it like on TV probably on a tape or something, but I just remember whenever it came on, it was always something that my oldest sister, probably my two older sisters like just loved. And so I just watched it again and again, you know, by default. And I just remember thinking like, wow, high school is. Is gonna be weird, you know, and there's just so like I wonder which one I am and you know Kind of like you really kind of dive into that thinking You know, if you watch it from a young age, you might not realize that this is a very, you know, kind of I think Individually did way of looking at Different groups, not to say that those don't exist because they definitely do, but I think they're kind of more blended together. It's not as distinct but I don't know. That depends on what high school you went to your experience. Things like that. you know I, kind of felt like I related to the Brian, I think his name was, the nerd I related to him a little bit, and then, the basket case, just because she just kind of felt, like, invisible, she was just kind of there, and was like weird, just being weird. I kind of related to those two the most, and a little bit the criminal too, just because, you know, we're all up in a dysfunctional family, and just kind of, you know, I definitely could see which way he was going, his logic, you know. But, what, did you relate to any of the characters?

Erin: 3:25

Yeah, I think probably when I watched it, I probably did relate more to, like, the basket case and, The criminal of the two and I think probably similar to, you know, like, no, dad, what about you? You know, like that part is like, oh, yeah, I've seen that. I've seen that in my household. And that seems very familiar. And the basket case, did recognize as myself, I mean, I'm not making, I wasn't making, uh, sugar sandwiches or anything, but I do the feeling of being ignored or not seen or just trying to, I was going to say get attention, but just be noticed. Yeah.

Tanya: 4:05

Yeah, for sure, that, that's she's a, she's one that I think not many people you know, really related to, I, I think it, she just kind of came off as weird and people, uh, like when I know when it was being discussed in my house, it was just she's weird, and, I don't know, just kind of strange, but, uh, I, yeah, I definitely lean towards her. Yeah. I didn't make the pixie sticks. And I didn't use, you know, put dandruff in paintings and stuff. I hope not, yeah. Or, you know, show up at detention just for fun. I certainly didn't do that. Yeah. But, you know, and definitely didn't come from a well to do family who just, you know, they just neglected me kind of thing. But, yeah. It was just, I don't know, I think she was a very relatable character and the fact that she was like, I don't know what to do with myself, like, nobody really sees me and I don't know how to be seen, and like, I'm just weird, kind of. That's the way I related to her. But, you know, I am kind of curious, you know we didn't really say anything about the jock or the princess with Claire, and what was the jock's name, Emilio Estevez, I can't remember his name, Andy or

Erin: 5:04

something? Yeah, Andrew, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I mean I never did sports growing up. So, he was probably unrelatable to me at, mean, I had. Friends that did sports and family members that did sports and you know, my brothers and sister, but I Yeah, I did not relate to his struggles as far as he's just trying to get a scholarship for college because of wrestling. That was not very relatable to me when I watched it when the first time, what about you? Did you relate to the Andrew person at all, or?

Tanya: 5:39

I think not on the surface. I didn't relate to I didn't relate to Claire at all. But I definitely, I think with Andrew, I think he was trying to meet his dad's expectations. Yeah. He, like, you know, kind of you know, gave the, Brian's friend A wedgie, like he ended up in detention because he gave him like a, an atomic wedgie or did something,

Erin: 5:57

he ended up taping his butt together I don't know if he used duct tape or something, but he ended up causing some like bodily harm to him. I think too, I think like with the Andrew character, I related to him more. like he seemed kinder at the end, you know, like and Claire still pretty much annoyed me Even though supposedly everyone changed at the end. I felt like she is still was still at a different socio economical class and just really Difficult just even how everyone else's has like their bag lunch and she has a whole presentation with her sushi. Yes It's who bring who brings sushi to school like that, you know, like as you know, like

Tanya: 6:33

With like the little mat, the wooden, the bamboo mat and everything. Yeah, I didn't really quite, I mean I just, socioeconomic status and like having money and just kind of focusing on that, I guess just because it's the only thing that she can hide behind, you know, that you can kind of see her humanity in that. And then with Andrew I think his father was a bully. And so he like needed to prove to him, you know, Hey, I'm like, I need attention because like, you know, and I'm really like this, you know, the same type of person you are, you know, like that's kind of how you can see Andrew the jock and he, you know, you can tell he felt really. bad about what he did, that he didn't even want to do it, but he felt compelled to do it, to like, you know, kind of make this image for his father that he's just, you know, one of the guys,

Erin: 7:15

one of the Jocks. Yeah, and who knows what else was going on at home, where maybe his dad is like, okay, well, you know, this is what defines you as, you know, an athlete or as my son or, you know, it's, yeah, and he didn't seem really upset that he was in Detention, just that he didn't want it to affect the meet the following week and his potential scholarship. But he didn't seem upset that he had detention, the dad.

Tanya: 7:39

Yeah, just for his career. But Andrew himself was like, I hate it. Like, I hate, you know, he just kind of hates everything about this role that he's been given. And you know, I think similarly with Claire, I think she's well, you know, this is kind of what I have and I can't let anybody see behind it kind of thing. You know, which was why it was such a big deal when she did the whole lipstick trick. It was like a vulnerability of her showing, you know, I don't know, some side of her that maybe, you know, would have looked uncouth or whatever, you know, kind of in in a different light. And so it was it was really interesting to me because I don't think I could relate to them when I was, you know, growing up at all, but actually looking back, I can see that they were all just kind of hiding behind what they were given. You know it was kind of like Claire and Andy were the two that were given the most power seemingly in the school, but they didn't even like the roles that they had. And they really didn't have much else because they didn't fit in anywhere else. And so I can kind of see from that now, looking back, you know, but I think when I was, you know, younger and in high school, I was just like, oh, they just need to shut up, you know, kind of thing. I don't think I could really, you know, understand that. But yeah, and, sorry, go ahead.

Erin: 8:45

Oh, I was going to say, and, uh, Brian, Anthony, Michael Hall's character, you know, even though he's a little dorky and, you know, his reason for being in detention was. You know, he's gonna try to, he's trying to kill himself and it was, you know, it's really, you know, because he was struggling with, you know, he got an F in a class and he brought a flare gun and the flare gun went off and everything. But he, when they talk about the clubs, when they're asking like, what do you know, what type of things do you do, you know, when you're, they're asking about like different involvement, he actually seemed the happiest about all the clubs. He's like, I'm in physics club, math club, this, you know, and he actually, you know, And then Claire is like, no, she did really, yeah, she's like, oh, no, they need to be social clubs. He's like, you know, but he's probably thinking like, but these are my friends. These are people that are like me and even though you know, he did seem a little dorky and he was struggling emotionally for his reason for being in detention. He actually seems like he is trying to connect with people in school

Tanya: 9:44

in a different way. He has a, you know, kind of different outlook on it than, uh, you know, the princess Claire, you know, and the fact that you hear that he's really under a lot of pressure to be something specific too, that he really cannot, You know his one kind of claim to fame or his one role in high school is feeling like oh I get good grades I you know, I maintain this i'm smart and the insecurity of like say maybe the jock You know where other people looking on that may pick on them is that oh you think you know so much It's so easy for you. You know, you kind of know it all even though there's this huge struggle that he has You know with kind of feeling like I need to get all A's and, you know, nobody really sees that part. And to the point where he has serious, you know, he has suicidal ideations, basically. Yeah. He's, you know, kind of thinking about like, I just want it to all end. He brings like a flare gun, I think, you know, to school. You know, and so it's kind of these desperate, you see behind a lot of these masks that, you know, they kind of see day in and day out. And you know, and in high school, but also, you know, if you apply that to the greater kind of society, you kind of wonder and say like you know, is there something to other people, you know, that they're struggling with? but I think nowadays with TikTok and like, I think there's almost an oversaturation of kind of what's behind. What's behind our thinking, you know, kind of thing. I almost think it's kind of gone the opposite way. Okay. Since that point where we don't really talk about mental health and now not to say that we talk about mental health too much, but almost like we are trying to figure ourselves out at this meta level, I think, and it's put out on, you know, TikTok and social media to the point where I feel like you can almost understand someone too much. And it's, you know, kind of really almost inundated with it, which I'm not making a judgment one way or the other, but. It's not a very it's not something like, you know, if somebody said, Oh, I'm struggling. And I feel this way. I think back then, and we're around, you know, the mid 80s, people would have been like, Oh, boo hoo, you have such a, you know, kind of tough life, right? Now I'd be like, Oh, you might want to go talk to someone kind of thing, you know, like they would recognize that.

Erin: 11:43

Well, one thing I was actually impressed when I rewatched the movie, I When he was talking about, like, you know, this is why I ended up in detention, because I got this F, I planned on doing this to myself, but the flare gun went off, you know, but at first, everybody's really listening, you can see their faces change, and they seem very physically upset, and just really, Concerned for him and concerned that he would do this and this is a virtual stranger I just met him a like a couple hours before and They realize that he's human and, you know, they, you could tell, like, you know, all these tough exteriors all of a sudden just soften. And then he talks about, oh, when the flare gun goes off and then they, you know, one of them starts giggling because it's funny, you know, the flare gun. He brought a flare gun to school. And then he starts laughing and then they all start laughing and it just lightens it up, you know, but I was, you know, I know it's a movie, but I was impressed that they all Kind of just had compassion towards him.

Tanya: 12:40

Yeah, that was pretty, pretty amazing considering that they carry these roles around and they kind of had to lead them and put them down and kind of see each other for who they were behind those everyday masks and to be able to kind of validate it and say like, okay this is actually tough for this person. This is not something that, yeah. I don't need to be defensive against this because this has nothing to do with me. This is actually about everybody's kind of struggle in general, in high school, and in finding yourself, and maybe in life, kind of, uh, all the way through. But you know, I was, in, in that, I was kind of wondering, do you feel like there were any misrepresentations or things that maybe weren't really well represented in terms of the, either the roles, the characters, or. something in the movie itself,, or something kind of like ridiculous. Like, I, for instance I think it was, and I think most people would agree with this, I think it was kind of stupid the way the detention was set up and they were like climbing up in the ceiling and like they were locked into, well, nowadays, I guess that would be, they would not be able to lock kids in to a building. And how, uh, you know, how kind of almost. violent, the principle was towards like really got incited by the criminal. And you know, and maybe there, there probably were, you know, back in the mid eighties that probably. Was not all that unrealistic, you know, but I guess it's kind of more in terms of like nowadays that would not happen It's just that would be a lawsuit waiting to happen all around well

Erin: 14:04

but it's also there probably are a lot of things like if you're in a Saturday detention Of course, the teacher doesn't probably want to stay there too. It's like I know i'm not in detention Why do I have to be stuck with these? Idiots but they, you would think that there would be some oversight and that was kind of, you know, you can't sit here, you know, you're just sitting here, you can't get up, it's, but not having the principal in there, or why does the principal have to be the one to watch them? Why isn't it another teacher or someone else that just, that, that seemed a little unrealistic to me, like why would the principal be the person who oversees Saturday detention?

Tanya: 14:39

Yeah, I mean there's definitely discrepancies and that might be different depending what school you went to, like if there's enough money for staff and all that stuff. But I don't, I really don't know. Like I said, I'm very out of touch with youth and stuff. Now, I really have no idea. But that's just, yeah, that's my gut feeling is that there's, And the fact that their characters are so defined, they're in these like very extreme categories, like there is the nerd, the princess, the criminal, the basket case, you know, and and I just think it's very much, nowadays it feels like it's more kind of blended, although I still think there is definitely clicky rules and clicks and everything. Oh, yeah.

Erin: 15:16

I mean I think there's always going to be clicks. I think there always has been clicks. I think there always will be. I mean, there it's just kind of how people think and, you know, like even going back to like, The movie grease or even before that like there's always been people who Different, you know, like you like this type of music. I like this type of music You like that, you know, you're in the same team of sports as I am, you know, whatever it's very And that people are kind of drawn to attracts like Instead of venturing off. It's kind of scary sometimes for people to Be friends with someone who Might like something different than them. Their friends might not be in the same group as the other ones. It's just, so I think this movie tried to show, okay, well, you could bridge that gap of you don't have to stay in your little cliques all the time. And which, I mean it is an extreme. It is so extreme. It's like, it's even with the little uniform, like, okay, well, I'm wearing my wrestling jacket. I'm looking like a princess. I'm, you know, dressed very, you know, criminal ish. And it does seem like even, like, the Judd Nelson character, Well, I probably all of them were really just wanting some sort of note of I was gonna say notoriety But just wanting to be noticed by someone.

Tanya: 16:27

Yeah, and that's really evident I think even in their final essay that they decide to write together I mean they have Brian the nerd or whatever they have him right write it But I think it's about you know kind of saying like you only see us in these roles kind of thing Have seen beyond that So even in the expectations from adults and people on the outside, and kind of this, you know, social identity, how you define yourself, but saying like is that really all that we are, you know, and is this what we kind of live off of? Is this what we go off of for the rest of our lives? Or do we start to see beyond that? You know and it's really interesting because if you've ever been to a high school reunion You know, you personally I have not attended, but I just, I mean, I think nowadays you can see on social media, you know, if you're friends with any, anybody can see there's big differences and how people used to be versus you know, who they are, because I think they were able to explore themselves, you know, maybe in college or after high school, whatever they decided to do, hopefully they've been able to explore different parts of themselves and realize, oh, I'm not just a jock. Oh, I'm not just this. I'm not just that. Right. And you know, and to be able to diversify that and to say, hey, I'm actually like kind of complex and I'm made up of things you know, that are more than just one category or a couple of categories. Yeah. I do still know of people that still do define. Like if I see them from high school or if I happen, they happen to message me on, you know, I don't know, Facebook, which I don't even use anymore. But if they do, they still think of me as high school, Tanya. They really don't want to know me beyond that. And it just kind of more points to the fact that they maybe haven't grown outside of that. And you know that's, it's unfortunate. I think it's a little, you know, it's a little strange because, you know we've, you know I'm two decades out from high school and hopefully you would, you know, feel that there's some change, some growth in that end. Yeah,

Erin: 18:16

I've had that same and it's weird, you know, because it's like, oh wait they just see me as this person I was or how I might have acted in, you know, You know, like senior year, or even a little bit after, and it's like, hopefully, mean, I'm still, you know, part of that personality is still there, but I hope I've matured, and I hope that I've changed, and I've learned to embrace different parts of myself, and Yeah I'm glad I'm not the same as I was in high

Tanya: 18:44

school. Oh, me too. Yeah. I mean, you're not under the same circumstances that you were, you know, like you're not in your home environment. You were able to get out there and choose, you know, a life for yourself. And even though you know, you may have had some of this stuff, from your childhood you had to deal with, you're able to go in a different direction, hopefully you know, in terms of most people, right? Yeah, but yeah there is definitely a, I definitely know at least a few people that, I mean, they, they, Just are stuck in that. Yeah, you know, they kind of think like that's the way people that's the way they are and anything outside of that is fake and it's just really it's strange to me. It's very bizarre.

Erin: 19:21

Yeah, or I grew up in a small town so it's some people who stay there just kind of get stuck in that mentality too of okay well they had that role and that's pretty much who they are who they evolved to. I'm not saying everyone who's a townie stays that way, but it does seem like a lot of people tend to, or a lot of people I've known, tend to, or have the potential to stay in that, those roles. And I think for myself, moving far away, And far away from my home where I grew up and also other things forced me to re evaluate things and to almost embrace who I maybe was when I was younger and who I am comfortable being now, you know, but yeah I think a lot of feeling like the basket case and the criminal and whatever else roles. for me, was probably stemmed from where I had to live, you know, like where I was living. And I didn't really have much say of that, you know, during high school and middle school and everything that was pretty predetermined.

Tanya: 20:27

Yeah it's very much like you're handed something, and you can kind of do a little bit within that box, but then hopefully after that, when you leave home, you're able to kind of say, oh wait that's not me, or, you know I remember, you know, that, that took me a while to kind of, you know, You know get away from that and just say wait a minute. That's not even me, you know, that's really not even and when people would say things like oh But you're this you're that like even a few years after and I would be like says who you know like you don't know if that was a Mechanism that I was using to just get by which it totally was. Yeah. Yeah a lot of times

Erin: 20:57

yeah, I mean I had a lot of different mechanisms I used to get by and survive And That doesn't define, that, I mean it might have defined a moment of me, but it doesn't define yeah, like 20 30 years later, you know, like it's not who I am.

Tanya: 21:13

Yeah. Yeah. It would be a very strange, like, I mean, and I'm glad I'm not in that spot. I'm really happy to be away from that, but I wouldn't even recognize that person. Like sometimes, like I think it was a few years back, somebody said something to me, a person that I, you know, maybe was, you know, Sort of friends within high school and they said something about, you know, well, I think you're someone who, who would just be nice to someone because, you know, you're a very nice person. And I was like, I mean, I don't know. I think I was just kind of quiet. You don't really know if I was nice, you know, like it's

Erin: 21:42

not really. You could have been, you could have been thinking pretty crappy things about them, you know, in your head. You could have been quietly, plotting. You're like, oh, I really can't stand this person. Or you know I wasn't at all. Like, I mean, you probably weren't nice. I'm sure you

Tanya: 21:54

were. I liked this person, you know, like it, it wasn't them, but they were just kind of defining me right in front of me. And I was like, you know, that's not like, there was a reason for why I was so quiet. There was a reason for this. And I realized that this dynamic was very much, you know with this particular friend. They really didn't want you know, they kind of just needed someone to be kind of a nice person who was laid back and to kind of be with them, you know, and so it's we just don't, you know, we don't really jive that well. And some people have gotten upset with me, think that like I've changed or, and I'm like, well, yeah, I, of course I have, you know, like, why haven't you? That's kind of bizarre to me.

Erin: 22:29

Yeah. And you don't need to, I mean. Yeah. You're, part of you is still there, you know, today, but you don't need to those same roles and to be that same person, and yeah, it's interesting. I do kind of wish when I was younger Maybe I had a little bit of all of that, like all of the different characters in The Breakfast Club. I wish, you know, like I always have the, oh, I wish my parents would have done this. But I do wish that there might have been a little bit, you know, more encouragement for, like, maybe A sport or Little, like Little, you know, like, or something, or, you know, maybe, you know, I know the social economical, that, that's You can't really help that when you're, you know, depending, you know, when you have that many kids and different, you know, your parents, but it's you do, you know, like or more encouragement in school or you know, whatever I wish there would have been a little bit of each little thing for me as child me or high school me or

Tanya: 23:21

whatever. Yeah, I can see that kind of like a bit of like, you know, a little bit of each of them kind of makes someone who's well rounded sort of thing because they are in the extremes. And yeah, I mean, it definitely, I think, kind of puts you behind the curtain to, to, you know, saying, okay what role do you play? And You know, is it, how does it change? I think it's, I think it is a little different now with social media. I think you can add in more aspects of your personality. I think more things are kind of talked about just by virtue of more things are out there. Right. More ability to find those things. But I do definitely think, you know, kids are always going to struggle and people are going to struggle on, you know, how to socially identify. It's. You know, or, you know, where to go, how to do it. I think this movie just gives a little bit of hope of, oh, peeking behind the curtain of, oh, this person might actually, you know, really just be hurting and their persona is really an entire defense mechanism against this.

Erin: 24:21

Yeah, I mean, like, you never know. And, which is so true then and now, even as adults, you know, we never know what other people are going through, what other people are struggling with, or what's happening at home, or how they are raised, which, you know, it's, it does make you pause just even for a moment to be like, okay, well maybe their interaction with me may not be because of me.

Tanya: 24:44

Right. Yeah. Yeah. It's, you know, kind of, I think maybe being able to see. outside of the social identity and kind of, you know, you just feel so much in that struggle when you're around that age and maybe a little bit beyond that, even maybe even, you know, all throughout your life, you kind of struggle as to like, where do I fit in? And this is kind of the first place that you see, but it doesn't have to be defined by that. It doesn't have to, you don't have to stick to being, you know, someone who is living up to your father's expectations or your parents expectations and grades, or, you know, You know, being the same type of vapid personality like the princess or you know, struggling to just even be a person because you don't get that at home, you know? Yeah. Like figuring out how to define yourself and how you do want to be seen. Yeah.

Erin: 25:26

That's a really big statement, isn't it? Yeah. How to be and how to, you know, be a person and figuring that out because some families you're not encourage Individualization you're encouraged, okay, well just follow what I'm doing, follow the steps that we do, stay quiet, or join this, or do that, without really choice there's, sometimes there, the lack of choice can really affect a person too, and not, really remembering that they're a person. Yeah.

Tanya: 25:53

And I, I think it's the system of it, you know the system of a family, the system of school and social identities. And I mean I know that personally, you know with my family, I just was kind of not considered unless I was someone who was very nice or very helpful. Yeah. And I still struggle with that a lot, you know nowadays and it still is very much like oh You don't support me blindly or you don't you know do this then you're a jerk, you know kind of thing Yeah I

Erin: 26:18

can't be recognized. Yeah, I definitely felt like in my family I had to have a few different roles and I sometimes think about it when I was younger Like young and then became a teenager or whatever but in order to be seen or to you know I felt like I Had to be the one to fix stuff, then had to be noisy, or had to be the criminal to get attention, or had, you know, like it's very, or just stay quiet and hide in my room. I did that, like, I felt like I did that for quite a few years just to avoid The family. Yeah. Then also it's like, why didn't they notice? But, you know, The

Tanya: 26:54

whole system was messed up. I mean, it's just, you know, they're not, there's a lot of things going on. I mean, you and I both grew up with a lot of siblings. Yeah.

Erin: 27:02

Yeah, a lot of siblings and alcoholism in my family. I mean, like my parents and Stuff.

Tanya: 27:06

Yeah. Yeah. A lot of things can I think in that can apply to you know, high school or just society right you know that depending on where you see yourself or how you've been treated you'll start to project that onto the world and it's about you know, maybe noticing that hey, I don't have to be this or maybe this isn't me. But maybe this served a purpose for this system, you know, high school or your family and say, yeah, this is not actually me.

Erin: 27:30

Yeah. It served a purpose. It helped

Tanya: 27:32

protect you. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. I realized why I, you know, my, you know, I've talked about this before, you know, selective mutism, why I couldn't say anything if I said anything and it was out of line with. You know people that needed to hear particular things or needed me to not say anything. It just it became almost like I just got this message that you know, it's just better to say nothing Yeah, absolutely nothing because anything will get you into this point of being a bad person or being labeled as I don't know, just these very negative things that you know, I absolutely feared and it was completely, when I would try to bring that up, it was just completely invalidated. It still is to this day. So I just don't say anything with regards

Erin: 28:17

to that. Yeah. It is interesting how other people's perceptions or what they view as reality is so much different than the person who lived it. Yeah. And, like, just as you were saying that, I remember, like, so often, like, when, whatever chaos or whatever was happening in my household, just hiding in my room with my big golden retriever and like one or two of my cats and just staying there and just, you know, just because there weren't people always that wanted that. I felt like I could talk to or notice me. And that's I think that's again being drawn to the basket. Case for lack of a better word for that person. Yeah, but it is it's hard. It's hard when there's chaos and Again in the high school environment, you know, like that movie is in all kids It's not every single kid's job to be like, oh wait, is there dysfunction and happening at your house? Me too like let's sometimes it does find I mean, I know I did have quite a few friends that had similar Family And similar experience, but it wasn't like we did a job interview. It just happened that, I don't know, maybe drawn to each other or noticed the sadness or the whatever it was. It's just something. Something. Do you have the markings? Yes. You don't get talked to at home. Or

Tanya: 29:35

everything gets piled on you and then they say like, don't talk. Yeah.

Erin: 29:38

Yeah. Or, yeah, or when you do want to, when you do finally. Yell or scream at home. It's like whoa, what's up, you know, like you're crazy. Yeah. Wow. Slow down You're you must have a lot of anger issues. It's like well, it's 15 years of you know, like whatever age you're at You know, it's like I gotta let it out

Tanya: 29:55

somehow it's gonna come out in a very odd bizarre way but You know, to, again, it's not knowing, it's not knowing each other's context, you know, and that's what really I feel like that's what is really important in mental health, is understanding people's context, not to make an excuse, but to understand how can I best represent this and what I want to say, what I want to communicate, who I want to be, and how I want to show that, you know, and or should I not engage in, in these things, and I think that is, I think that's, That is a good takeaway from this movie. Yeah, kind of say like, oh you can see a common thread between all of these kids and all of people, you know that are in this environment that where they're supposed to be defined and

Erin: 30:34

take on these roles. Yeah, and I think that's also what was so interesting and almost shocking at that time because You look at them physically. They all look different. They all come from different places. They all have different friend groups But, after eight hours, they ended up managing to go deep, and kind of cut all those layers, and figure out like, oh wait, we all have this little level of dysfunction that we're dealing with, and this is how we process it at school, or this is why we overachieve or or we bully, or we, you know it's, it is, it's, interesting and I still think the movie held up. There was some parts that I had to fast forward while I was watching it. I ended up watching it this morning before our taping, but it's, it still holds up. I mean, the music is great and I think

Tanya: 31:18

that. I've been singing the don't you forget about me song for the past

Erin: 31:21

week. Yeah. And I mean, it's still I don't think I realized how old. Jud Nelson looked in the movie. Oh yeah. Oh my god. Until I'm watching it as an adult because as a kid, I remember watching it and thinking like, oh, he's so dreamy. Again, we all know my experience with, I mean, come on, Niles Niles from Niles Crane. Yeah, I don't ha but I remember thinking like, oh wow, he's so dreamy. But I also, I was kind of torn because I already had a big crush on Emilio Estevez because I loved Outsiders. So I, and I don't know if he had already been in Young Guns, but I already was like, uh, swooning over him. And then, but then I remember, like, as a kid thinking like, oh, Judd Nelson is so, you know, cool and, but then watching it as an adult, watching it, I was like, holy cow, he looks old. And I had to Google it, and he was 25, but. Oh wow. Okay. Molly Ringle was 17 and Anthony Michael Hall was 17. And Ally Sheie and Am Emilio Estevez were both like 20, 22 or 23, but he must have been a very, yeah, that sounds about right. But he looked like a very old 25, but also they didn't have as much filtering. As they do now, they probably didn't have like all the different lenses, like the filters over the lenses while they're filming, and so everyone's airbrushed,

Tanya: 32:39

and, yeah. And they were probably trying to make him look kind of like trashy and everything, so they probably didn't want to put much like makeup on him, but. Yeah when you go back, you almost kind of think, you know, now, like, if you, say, if you're seeing it for the first time now, you might think, oh man, is this guy gonna end up being that he's not even going to high school? He's just a weird adult that's

Erin: 32:57

just kind of going to school. It's like back, yeah like 21 Jump Street, like, sometimes when you looked at it, it's like Richard Grieco looked like he was like 50. You know, like some of the

Tanya: 33:10

It's like, yeah. Johnny Depp looked good, though. I mean, he did. He

Erin: 33:14

did, and yeah, It's

Tanya: 33:17

funny, I think we went to But even then, they still look older. I mean, I think a lot of people now look a lot younger.

Erin: 33:23

Yeah. Just like, than they do at that age, like back then. Yeah. Like what? Like if you watch 9 0 2 1, oh, what is that? Iron? Whatever, whatever the blonde curly had, earing, whatever. Yeah. He looked like he was like 30, like in a high school, you know? And he probably was,

Tanya: 33:35

and it's, and so was Andrea or whatever. Yeah. She

Erin: 33:38

was very much, yeah,

Tanya: 33:39

she was 30 something. I think she was the oldest person and she was like, but she,

Erin: 33:43

she kind of looked really old, but they also dressed her like a school marm

Tanya: 33:46

and, yeah. Yeah. I, it's funny I didn't notice this. But yeah, when I look back, I'm like, Oh my God. Yeah.

Erin: 33:53

I didn't notice it either. Cause it was like, okay, well she's just kind of frumpy or he's just cool with his big, like Judd Nelson with a big trench coat and his boots and did it. But then it's like, Oh my gosh, he, I wonder if it was hard for him to play. Like a 17 or 16 year old kid when he's like 26 or 25, whatever, however, or 50. He, I don't know how old he, I mean he looked, I think he was like either 20, he looked a lot older, like look, watching it I was like, holy cow, he looks so much older than everybody.

Tanya: 34:23

So he'd be like in his

Erin: 34:24

60s now. Yeah, I think he is. I think I don't know. I don't know how old he is.

Tanya: 34:29

The last time I saw him, he was on, he made a guest appearance on Two and a Half Men with Charlie Sheen, which is

Erin: 34:36

Emilio Estevez's. Yeah, because they, yeah, and well, they kind of look alike, don't they? Like, I think that's because Charlie Sheen always like played like the bad guy too, like in, like, Wasn't he in, like, St. Elmo's Fire, or was that Rob Lowe? I think that was

Tanya: 34:51

Rob Lowe. he was in like, I think Charlie Sheen was in like, yeah, he was always kind of like a, you know, a scruffy, like, you know, badass kind of guy. Yeah. You know, that didn't follow the rules. And it's the same in Two and a Half Men, but. Yeah. Yeah, it was, that's the last time I saw him, which is probably like 15 years ago.

Erin: 35:07

I don't even know what what else he's been in. I was trying to see if I could but he's, Yeah, it's I don't know. Yeah, because it's funny. I was listening. I was thinking this morning. I was like, oh, yeah. Yeah Okay, jed nelson. He did all those movies with the kids being taken. I was thinking liam neeson And I was

Tanya: 35:27

oh, I was like, what are you talking about with the kids being taken? It's

Erin: 35:31

like what is wrong with me? Because I was like, oh, yeah, he had a really great film career after Breakfast club. I was I don't know what I was thinking. I was like, oh, yeah, jed nelson You And then I was thinking Liam Neeson's name was Judd Nelson. I don't know. I had like a weird Neeson, Nelson. Yeah, I just had like a weird brain You know brain flop this morning, but so age he is 64 years old today. I mean not today It's not his birthday. His birthday is in November. But yeah, he's 64 years old Wow. Jed Nelson. Not Liam Neeson. I don't know how old he

Tanya: 36:03

is. It's so strange to just kind of look back and just to know the ages of control that you thought were like 16, although apparently they were 25 even back then. You know? Yeah. And then you're already watching the movie like, I, I think I was watching it in the early 90s, so that's even like seven years after, so he's in his 30s by the time I was watching it. I'm thinking he's like 16,

Erin: 36:21

you know? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I must have watched it in because I think it came out in 85 and so I, it was either eighth grade or freshman year was probably the first time I watched it.

Tanya: 36:33

Yeah I'm pretty sure I watched, I mean I think when it first came out, I was three. Yeah, I don't

Erin: 36:38

think. So I wouldn't be. I mean, I, mean. That would be pretty inappropriate. It was probably

Tanya: 36:41

on, like, whenever it came to TV. Yeah. But. It seemed

Erin: 36:44

like things came to TV quicker. But maybe, like. Maybe they didn't. I don't know. We didn't really go see things in theater too much. I mean, I remember seeing E. T. in the theater, but yeah, but I don't know.

Tanya: 36:58

All very, you know, all this talk about mental health, the 80s and you know, how old people were is just

Erin: 37:07

So Gen X. It isn't it? We're very existential thought process of what was, what could be, what, yeah, it's very, but yeah it is very Gen X and I'm sorry if, you know, and if you're not Gen X or not around this time. This is a really good you should, you know what, we're not apologizing for this, because you should be, you know, they say other generations is the greatest generation, but you know, but enjoy it we're trying to educate you. On mental health topics that you might not be aware of. Or know you need. The

Tanya: 37:41

given perspective of Gen X. That, that's a pure, that's a Gen X movie if ever there was one. Oh yeah

Erin: 37:47

That, yeah, it's, that and, I don't know if I'll ever do it. The Better Off Dead movie kind of always was one of my favorites. I think that was a John Hughes movie too. was at Matthew Broadwax's like, I want my 2. Like the guy's like chasing him. Oh,

Tanya: 37:59

I remember that. Yeah. With. Yeah. I think I know. Yeah. I vaguely remember that. Yeah. Or Ferris Bueller. Yeah. There's

Erin: 38:06

this. So don't worry. Don't worry. If you guys think we're going to stay current, we're going to always go back to the 80s or 90s every once in a while. Just to throw off the scent. And but it is, I mean, like, it's also fun. I mean, it is. I have heard that a lot of people are going back to, oh, let's watch some of the classics. You know, like, let's watch, you know, like, and a lot of people are because just like with music and stuff, it's important to know generations and different things.

Tanya: 38:32

Yeah, I think to know where everything kind of, because I think one generation after the next is a branch off of the other, it's a response from the other generation. So it's kind of good to know like where everything echoes and, I mean, it's history. So yeah, you know, Gen X, get to know

Erin: 38:46

them. Yeah. That's true. Say hello to one if you work with them or if you are one.

Tanya: 38:52

It's good. I'm actually, I'm technically I'm in, I'm a very late millennial,

Erin: 38:56

but I, we will let you in. We will let you in. You like the Golden Girls, and you understand.

Tanya: 39:01

Yeah. I definitely grew up with a lot of Gen X influences.

Erin: 39:04

All your families are Gen X too, so you probably, by default, and, yeah. It's weird. The two

Tanya: 39:11

oldest, or the three oldest, I guess. Yeah. Yeah, very much Gen X. But yeah, me and my twin sisters, they were, we were like early 80s, so we were kind of, eh.

Erin: 39:20

I don't know, because you see some things, it's like, okay, up to, I've seen some that say, even say up to 88, then I see some that are like, nope, 79, you know, it's really weird. Like the different.

Tanya: 39:30

Yeah. Just by the feel, though, I would say I can definitely relate to, Millennial culture to a degree, but I don't feel like that's what my or like I feel like I'm kind of half in half out Yeah with both. Yeah, but you know and don't really feel I don't know. It's weird I guess it depends on who you're around maybe that yeah, I feel that way.

Erin: 39:51

Yeah, and the millennial Generation is so long too. I mean, they're so it seems like it goes. Why does that like 15 years? It's like a long span Oh,

Tanya: 40:04

is it? Yeah, so maybe that's kind of part of it is that everybody kind of feels a little millennial. Maybe. Yeah. Because there's just so much that happened, I think, technologically and like with social media. So people probably, that changes a lot. Anyways we are getting off track, but

Erin: 40:19

which tends to happen. Yeah. If you're still with us, if you're still listening.

Tanya: 40:24

Yeah. But we really hope you enjoyed this talk on the Breakfast Club and strolling down 80s memory lane. Gen X, all that good stuff. But, yeah, so we, uh, we hope you enjoyed this little stroll this, you know, look at mental health, and these, uh, The Breakfast Club. Pretty cool characters. Yeah, so don't forget to leave us comments. Let us know if you have suggestions for future episodes. We always love that yeah, don't forget to follow us on Instagram at wicked psychotherapists. Yeah On Facebook, we are The Wicked Psychotherapist, and subscribe, follow, wherever you currently listen to podcasts, or as you are right now, because you're listening to us right

Erin: 41:05

now. Hit follow, if you're, if you just happened to find us. Click follow right now. Do it. Yeah, subscribe. Just

Tanya: 41:11

do it, just do it And don't forget, stay wicked.

Erin: 41:15

And keep your mind well.

41:17

We Wish You a Merry Christmas And, uh, I'm sorry.